Chapter 45

Episode 45

Ilian touched her forehead briefly, then pulled his hand away and spoke as if making a declaration.

“You’ll be able to get up by tomorrow.”

“Is there any reason I have to get up?”

Lydia also thought that, having rested the entire day, the cold didn’t seem as severe as expected and seemed likely to pass lightly.

Her body didn’t feel as heavy as she thought it would.

She had only responded offhandedly while checking her condition, but Ilian suddenly fell silent.

By the time Lydia sensed something odd and looked at him, Ilian blinked several times, unusually for him, and delivered sudden news as if he had just remembered something important.

“I think I need to go to Esteban’s main estate.”

“What? Why?”

“My sister might need my help, and the capital is too far from the Lescal Archipelago.”

Only then did Lydia remember, due to everything that had happened yesterday, that she had completely forgotten the most important matter—the conversation between Katrina and Ilian.

She suddenly sat up. But then, feeling the world spin again, she closed her eyes with a low groan.

“Ah… my head hurts. Just a moment.”

“That’s what happens when you move suddenly.”

When she opened her eyes again, the blue eyes that met hers held that same expression.

Unfamiliar, yet somehow she wanted to become familiar with it.

‘As if he’s genuinely worried…’

What emotion could that worry be connected to?

Just a bothersome obligation? Was he simply hoping she’d recover quickly so he could hurry to Esteban’s territory?

As Lydia’s complicated emotions showed clearly on her face, Ilian let out a faint sigh and cut off her deepening thoughts.

“…I didn’t mean we’d leave tomorrow. Don’t overthink it, Lydia.”

“Is it showing on my face?”

“Of course it is.”

As she unconsciously reached up to touch her face, he shook his head slightly with a smile.

Even his easy smile felt strange, and Lydia stared at him blankly.

He was making her fall into a delusion.

As if this kind of time between them was normal, making her unintentionally long for more and feel the absence of it.

“But that doesn’t mean you can keep lying around forever, so lie back down.”

“You nag more than my grandmother.”

She said it playfully, but her voice trembled strangely the more she spoke.

Since her grandmother had passed, whenever she felt unwell like this, all she could do was lie at home and stare blankly at the ceiling.

In truth, the pressure not to get sick had been so strong that she’d never really been able to feel truly “at ease” while being ill.

Even while suffering from a long, persistent cough, she still had to open the shop.

Her life simply didn’t function unless she kept it moving.

She had thought she didn’t mind that life and that it was fine, but maybe it wasn’t.

“Why are you about to cry again?”

“I’m not crying.”

Lydia hastily covered her face completely with a pillow, hugging it tightly and burying her face.

She really didn’t want to cry. Even if she tried to use her illness as an excuse, she had done this before, too.

When she was in front of Ilian, the calmness she had so carefully and firmly built up always seemed to crumble all at once, revealing her raw emotions.

“Does it hurt a lot? The physician only prescribed some light medicine—should I ask him to come check again?”

“No. That would be more troublesome.”

In the end, Lydia had the pillow taken from her and, with nowhere to hide, turned to lie on her side.

“Lydia.”

Ah, surely she would miss this.

The way someone called her so sincerely, with such deep emotion, brought a sense of comfort.

It was the kind of presence that made her feel like she was breathing, living, and continuing to exist.

Though she knew she shouldn’t get attached to moments that would inevitably end, she couldn’t help but want to stay like this forever, simply because she liked the feeling of being cared for.

“The Lescal Archipelago—why? What… did Countess Rodrigo say?”

Though Katrina had told her to call her by name, trying to do so now only made Lydia feel more attached, something she wanted to avoid.

All of these current moments were ones she needed to leave behind without regret. Everything entering her life under the name Esteban felt overwhelming.

“She didn’t really explain. That’s just like her. She’s always been that way—thinking through everything alone, resolving it by herself, and only telling people after she’s already decided.”

“That sentence sounds exactly like someone I know well.”

From behind her came a soft laugh. When Lydia turned around slightly, she saw him gazing into the air with a faintly bitter smile.

Disliking that expression for some reason, she reached out to him, and Ilian silently took her hand. Their fingers interlocking now felt quite natural.

Lydia suddenly wondered what he might be thinking. She was both curious and not curious about what meaning might lie behind all these actions.

“Being closer makes it easier to stay in touch with her, and it’s more reassuring for both of us.”

Still, Ilian had faith that Katrina could handle things, since she had said she could.

So rather than being wary, he was going more as a precaution. He also agreed with her that it was finally time to visit the main estate.

“Are you okay with this?”

“With what?”

“Going to Esteban’s main estate. It’s not something we agreed on between us.”

That was true.

It had never really been part of their plan, but Lydia, hearing him bring up their contract, suddenly felt grounded, as if waking from a dream.

That’s right. They had met because they each had something the other needed.

“It’s not like I can stay here just because I don’t want to go. And it’s meaningless to insist you stay here either.”

Speaking of their contract naturally made her tone stiff, and the formal title slipped out.

“It won’t be bad. I spent my childhood there, I can guarantee that.”

“Your childhood, huh.”

“Yeah. The scenery is worth seeing. The season will be perfect when we go down, too.”

Lydia was surprised at herself for welcoming the journey more than she’d expected.

Seeing it as Ilian Esteban taking her to his own ‘space’ made her inwardly feel excited, which felt ridiculous.

Trying to hide that feeling, she calmly spoke, listing facts as if they were obvious.

“You spoke as if it’s natural for the Marchioness to stay at the main estate, so I guess it makes sense to go.”

Countess Rodrigo had even mentioned her directly and been considerate from the start.

It made Lydia uncomfortable and uneasy that she would have to deceive someone who had liked her from the beginning.

She didn’t want the person who believed her only brother had found happiness to be too disappointed. That lingering discomfort remained.

‘Is that really the end of it…’

Or maybe, just maybe, by joining this journey, she wanted to know more about Ilian Esteban.

Going to a place where he had spent his childhood certainly had a special meaning.

“Then let’s make preparations.”

Ilian himself was just now realizing the meaning of bringing Lydia to that particular place.

Though many guests had come and gone from this mansion, it had been ages since an outsider had set foot in Esteban’s main estate.

The last time had been during a banquet when his real mother was still alive.

That version of Ilian, from before he became the Marquess of Esteban, still remained there.

“By the way, what’s that?”

Lydia let go of his hand and suddenly reached for an object on the nightstand beside the bed. Ilian, seeing her pick up the small but ornate box, gave a reluctant answer.

“A gift from Alec.”

Of all things, he had forgotten to put it away out of sight. Now that it had ruined the mood, Ilian shot a resentful look at the box.