Chapter 119
“Ah, I’m fine.”
At the distinct concern that appeared on her seemingly cold face, Einar clenched and unclenched his fist.
How foolish his past self had been, thinking he could be patient, that he could capture her if he took enough time.
As each day passed and his feelings for Riina deepened, Einar found himself desperately wanting to be by her side, wanting her to remain beside him.
Smiling at the lips visible in her line of sight as she looked up at him, Einar raised his hand before Riina could feel any awkwardness.
—Knock, knock.
“Come in.”
Sierre’s permission came as if he knew exactly who was visiting, and Einar and Riina entered the room.
Einar, who had somehow already approached the bed permeated with the smell of medicine, supported Sierre’s back as he struggled to rise.
“Th-thank you.”
“No need to thank me for such things. I am your brother, after all.”
As Einar brushed back the hair that had fallen over Sierre’s forehead and smiled, the child’s cheeks—so pale they appeared blue with visible veins—flushed.
“I pay my respects, Your Highness.”
“Ah, Lady Bolshevik. You… came.”
Sierre, his cheeks turning even redder, awkwardly waved his hand and smiled, and Riina took that hand.
“Yes. Am I intruding?”
“Not at all. Thank you for coming.”
“There’s no need to thank me for such things. After all, I’ll be your sister-in-law.”
At her words, nearly identical to what Einar had just said, both the young, high-pitched voice and the low male voice responded simultaneously.
“Huh?”
“What?”
Sierre made no attempt to hide his bewilderment at Riina’s roundabout way of saying they were family, and she had somewhat expected such a reaction.
But why was Einar looking at her with an indescribable expression from beside the child?
Sierre was watching intently, and Einar should know that she had said it to avoid burdening the child’s mental health.
“That’s right. Yes. You’ll be my sister-in-law.”
Sierre grinned sheepishly while fidgeting with the hand clasped in Riina’s, and she stared at Einar with coldly narrowed eyes.
Perhaps sensing the silent pressure to speak, Einar suppressed whatever he wanted to say and asked Sierre:
“Your decision?”
“I’ve made it.”
Sierre responded without missing a beat, then added:
“I don’t want to see that medicine anymore. Or the… nursemaid.”
Though he faltered slightly, Sierre said what he needed to say until the end.
As Sierre’s small head gradually drooped while speaking, Einar, who had been watching, opened his mouth.
“You don’t have to do it yourself.”
Riina picked up on Einar’s matter-of-fact statement.
“If there’s no need to experience painful and difficult things, it’s best not to. You might mature through pain, but that’s not always the case.”
It wasn’t complete nonsense to say that pain and hardship are experiences that help in life.
But in most cases, painful and difficult things need not be experienced.
And the shock and pain received from such experiences never disappear, no matter how much time passes.
One only feels that they’ve become numb to it, but losses and failures become poisonous as they accumulate and time passes.
Having experienced this firsthand, Riina truly hoped that Sierre wouldn’t have to cut off someone so close and beloved himself.
Her hand holding the child’s instinctively tightened.
If only this warmth could be conveyed.
If only he would remember not just the pain that struck his heart when recalling this day in the future, but also the hands clasped together.
When Riina closed her mouth, silence fell over the room for a while.
Eventually, Sierre slowly but unmistakably shook his head.
“I’ll… do it myself.”
It was a voice so small that it was barely audible even to attentive ears, but the determination it held was firm.
Sierre, who had raised his bowed head, took a deep breath and choked.
“Cough, cough cough cough!”
“Your Highness, calm your breathing slowly and have some water.”
Einar stroked the child’s emaciated back while Riina held his trembling hand and offered water.
After a terrible fit of coughing that left tears in his eyes, Sierre only moistened his lips with the water Riina gave him, then his face turned bright red.
It was immensely embarrassing to choke simply from taking a deep breath; no matter how weak his body was, it was mortifying.
Wasn’t his congenitally weak constitution all because of the medicine?
Of course, it had been a while since he had taken the medicine given by the nursemaid, but since he hadn’t properly recovered, his body still trembled at the slightest breeze.
Sierre’s face, which had been momentarily flushed with embarrassment, spoke in a small voice:
“I want this handled quietly, so will you… help me?”
“Of course.”
Upon hearing Einar’s answer, Sierre set down the water glass and pulled the bell cord.
“Bring the nursemaid.”
Minutes after the servant receiving the order left, the nursemaid appeared.
“Your Highness, you called…”
As the door closed, Einar moved behind the nursemaid, kicked the back of her knees, and pressed down on her shoulders.
Forced to kneel, the nursemaid seemed so taken aback by the sudden turn of events that she could only sit on the floor with a blank expression, unable to react.
Sierre wasted no time in speaking.
“Nursemaid, why did you try to kill me?”
It was a question that came without preamble, but it struck at the exact core of the matter.
If anyone in this place had something to ask the nursemaid, it would be Sierre alone, and if Sierre, the person directly involved, had anything to ask, it would only be the reason.
They had already investigated whether the nursemaid was in collaboration with someone outside or being used by someone, and confirmed that she had no relationship with anyone.
This meant that the nursemaid’s actions were entirely her own decision.
“Why? Why did you do it?”
Sierre maintained a calm face even with the nursemaid before him, but his voice was gradually losing its composure.
Still, no answer came.
The nursemaid blinked her eyes as if she had never imagined such a situation, then belatedly stammered a response after a long pause.
“Y-Your Highness? Your Highness, what is this about.”
“Why did you kill my mother and try to kill me too?”
Before the nursemaid could finish speaking, Sierre repeated his question like a parrot.
In truth, that was all Sierre wanted to know.
Sierre’s lips turned purple, and the room was engulfed in a suffocating silence.
How much time passed with no one saying a word?
Between the nursemaid and Sierre staring at each other without blinking, it was the nursemaid’s tightly closed lips that opened first.
“I don’t understand what you’re saying, Your Highness. But I suppose you’re punishing me like this because I’m lacking. It’s all because I am inadequate and insufficient.”
However, the words she uttered with a gentle smile were completely unrelated to Sierre’s question.
Moreover, to the three people who knew the truth, excluding the nursemaid herself, it was an answer so contemptible it went beyond mere deception.
Since Sierre was still gazing at the nursemaid with open eyes and closed mouth, neither Einar nor Riina spoke first or took any action.
The child wanted to make the decision himself and handle the matter with his own hands, so they simply waited.
“Your High…”
“You don’t need to say more. Actually, regardless of what the reason was, I felt I would have the same feelings whether I heard it or not.”
Just as the nursemaid was about to speak again, Sierre poured out his words.
The child’s voice no longer trembled or wavered.
It was just as quiet as this palace.
And Sierre pronounced the final judgment.
“That will be all.”
At that moment, the nursemaid opened her eyes wide as if they would tear, and her mouth opened even wider, but her voice never came out.
With a thud, the nursemaid’s body collapsed forward like a puppet with cut strings.
Einar, who had struck the back of the nursemaid’s neck to render her unconscious, nodded to Sierre, who pulled at the corners of his mouth to form something resembling a smile and nodded.
That was the end.
Strong servants entered, and the nursemaid was dragged away.
She would never appear before Sierre again.
No, she would never appear before anyone again.
Sierre did not cry.
Though his dry eyes turned red, the child did not look away and took in the sight of the nursemaid’s departure until the very end.
Eventually, all the servants disappeared as well, leaving the three of them alone again.
Riina did not let go of Sierre’s hand, which had turned cold as ice, and Einar covered the feverishly hot forehead with his cool hand.
Sierre kept staring at the place where the nursemaid had been.
So… so simple and easy it was.
The path to sending away someone who had been by his side his entire life and who seemed as though she would remain there forever.
Strangely, his heart didn’t hurt.
It just felt empty.
A corner of his heart was completely hollow, but what that was, what kind of feeling it was, he couldn’t quite tell…
The child rubbed his chest where the bones could be felt.
Even after rubbing and rubbing again, not knowing what to do, he was about to beat his chest with both hands when he paused.
He could feel warmth from the hand that wasn’t rubbing his chest.
For the first time, Sierre took his eyes off the place where the nursemaid had been.
The child’s gaze fell on his own hand, held by Riina.
