Chapter 41: To Love

The reason for deliberately involving a descendant of Karon, one who stood in direct opposition to Lucius, was clear.

The girl he had ruined with his own hands, the one he had hurt, the one he had forced to walk a thorny path.

For Morgana, Morgan le Fay, Tiana Marietta Klein’s pitiful life. He had put in place every possible safeguard, just in case…

But what was the use of any of it? Fay had suffered unbearable agony because of his very existence!

“I… I am the one who…!”

Crash. 

As Lucius’s fury erupted, the blue gemstones shattered behind him, crumbling to dust. The name he had given a frightened young girl in place of her real one – the magician’s name. Such an obvious hint!

‘Why did it take me so long to realize? Idiot, fool, worthless scoundrel, worse than a cur!’

The great dragon? Ha! I was the one who used an innocent girl, Fay, as a hostage to deal with my own troubles!

What was even more astonishing was that she had vaguely grasped the significance of what Baroah had done.

It had happened when she was so young, her memories of facing him should have been hazy at best. And yet, she was unbelievably perceptive.

Who was I to look down on you?

Overcome with self-loathing, Lucius clenched his teeth.

[“Give me a hint, just like when you deliberately gave me both the names Morgana and Morgan le Fay.”]

I left the path to her happiness untouched, yet I prided myself on my ignorance… Ha… A great being? A ruler above all living things? Just because the ancient dragons and deities had vanished from the world, did I really think I could do as I pleased? How ridiculous.

Lucius staggered as he left Baroah’s chambers.

The moment he departed, the scattered blue dust on the floor and the crimson magic tome quietly began to burn.

He had no idea where he was headed. He simply knew he could not leave the domain of the Magic Tower.

I have committed an unforgivable sin against Fay, and until she absolves me, I can do nothing. I… I… I am forever a sinner in your eyes… Fay. Morgana. Jenna. Tiana. You…

His aimless steps suddenly halted.

“Lucius!”

A cheerful voice, light and lively, a voice he should not have been able to hear.

‘Didn’t you say you were sleeping?’

Even as Lucius’s dark pupils trembled violently, the only thing visible on Fay’s face as she approached was pure delight.

“Hehe, I tried to take a nap, but I couldn’t sleep at all, so I got up. Were you coming back from the library? But your hands are empty.”

Why… Why did you have to appear now, just when I was drowning in the deepest self-loathing? The most absurd part was… The moment you appeared, my emotions became both lighter and more unbearably chaotic. Do you even know?

“…”

“Hmm? Was lunch not to your liking today? I love French toast. If the meal wasn’t satisfying, should we go get some custard pudding? The chef said he’s only making it for three days this winter before his hands get stiff from the cold. Let’s go have some.”

Refusal was impossible. Fay had taken complete possession of his soul’s heart.

Without a word, without a signal, he reached out and clasped her delicate hand. He simply wanted to. Her hands, roughened by handling herbs and parchment, felt to him as sweet and soft as cake cream.

Something deep inside his hardened body melted away in an unfamiliar sensation.

Ah… Fay. I… You said you wanted a dragon’s heart? I suppose it already has an owner. Yes. That would be you. If you ever want it, I’ll give it to you anytime. When would be best? Perhaps on the day of my demise, the day that brings you happiness.

“…Lucius?”

“I think I’m doomed.”

He twisted his lips into a wry smile.

Romantic poetry, poetic confessions, none of it mattered. He could not bring himself to utter such things, not when he had just realized how close he had come to turning the world into hell.

Who was he to speak of love?

Fay widened her eyes in surprise at his unexpected words, then burst into laughter.

“Oh, but I feel the same way! Remember that mandrake and bundle of herbs I won at auction? I tried making herbal tea with a recipe I found, and it was absolutely disgusting.”

“…”

“It tasted like month-old socks mixed with rotting eggs! But at least my alchemy teacher said it had good healing properties.”

“If you don’t want it, just give it all to Momo.”

Fay laughed again at his deadpan remark.

“Really, Lucius! You’re so scary, even though you’re Momo’s real master.”

“…Momo is yours now. You seem fond of him, so do as you please. Whether you keep him or discard him, I won’t interfere.”

If that was all he could give her without emotions attached, then he should at least do that much. She simply shook her head with a smile.

“Oh, don’t be silly. I know exactly who you are. Once I live out my short human life, you’ll take Momo back and return to your vast, quiet domain, right?”

His heart plummeted at her casual certainty.

Why would you say that? Fay, Morgana, Tiana – you are meant to be happier than anyone. Your end would mean mine, too. A world without you holds no meaning for me. Should I give it to you now before it becomes useless? My heart, which speeds up and stops whenever I see you, is already in disarray.

Gripping his chest, he asked, “Who am I?”

Did you know?

Fay, unaware of the unspeakable sorrow in Lucius’ eyes, spoke cheerfully.

“Of course! Hmm, you’re an elf mage, right? Technically, part high elf. You live much longer than humans, so you know Momo, and your magic skills are incredible.”

“…”

Thud.

A loud crashing sound erupted in front of her. A once-mighty dragon had completely lost its will and collapsed with a heavy thump.

“L-Lucius?”

He sank to the ground, utterly losing his composure.

What was I even expecting…?

As the startled Fay tried to pull him up by the hand, he muttered darkly.

“I told you earlier, I think I’m doomed.”

“Huh? Oh… yeah.”

“And to make it worse, I think I’ve been completely played.”

Fay tilted her head.

“Huh? How? Your nose looks fine to me… Wait, what did you do? Did you touch some kind of herb you weren’t supposed to? If there’s a plant that messes up your nose on contact, I should definitely take notes.”

Her endless chatter dragged Lucius even deeper into the abyss.

“…”

I’m doomed. Yeah, completely doomed. I had a vague feeling before, but now I know for sure. I’m utterly doomed!!

Seeing Lucius’ complexion turn deathly pale, Fay gasped.

“Lucius? Are you okay? Hmm, this won’t do. Let’s go to the cafeteria and get some snacks. A little sugar should perk you up.”

Practically dragged along, he found himself mechanically chewing on custard pudding that he couldn’t even taste. It wasn’t until he had almost finished it that he thought, I should have just given it all to Fay, since she actually enjoys this.

Watching her happily scrape up the last few spoonfuls, he realized there was only one thing left for him to do.

He smiled. A bright, foolish smile. The kind of smile that could only belong to a man hopelessly in love. Thankfully, no one noticed his dumb, lovestruck expression. Not even the one he loved.

* * *

The winters in Lapis, the imperial capital, were particularly long. Spring, summer, and fall were mild, but winter stretched from mid-October to late March.

No one knew exactly why, yet ever since the Arkan Empire had established Lapis as its capital, there had never been any talk of relocating. That alone was proof of Lapis’ many other advantages. However, there was one person who absolutely despised its long winters.

“Ugh, it’s that dreadful season again.”

“Marchioness Hyante, I heard you attended the last winter ball at the imperial palace but had to rest in your chambers due to illness. How is your health these days?”

Lady Jonah Hyante didn’t even glance at Baroness Gachell, who had attempted to start a conversation. Instead, she continued speaking.

“Watching a Drakan from the city walls? That was a first for me. I only caught a glimpse of it through the window, but it was enormous. My goodness, letting such a grotesque, winged beast fly over the imperial palace… how appalling.”

“The Crow Knights seem quite pleased with that Drakan Rider.”

“Oh my! Really?”

“They say she was there even during the Harvest Festival. She entered the order through a contract, and now they’re considering making that mage girl the official symbol of their knighthood. Isn’t that astonishing?”

Baroness Gachell was doing her best to keep up with Jonah Hyante’s conversation. At last, Jonah showed a flicker of interest.

“The Crow Knights?”

“Yes!”

The Crow Knights included her family’s long-standing enemy, Raphael, the Young Lord of House Orleans.

Hmm… Now that I think about it, Kassel, the eldest son of Duke Klein, became the commander of the Blue Rose Knights, yet Raphael is still just a regular knight. Maybe I should stir things up a little?

Jonah’s lips curled into a cool smile as she lowered her gaze behind her fan.

“Hmmm, well, I suppose it makes sense. Another winged symbol, after all. And since that Drakan Rider was assigned directly to His Highness the Crown Prince, forming a connection with the imperial order isn’t a bad choice.”

“…”

“That makes me wonder. What will the Blue Rose Knights choose as their symbol?”

“…Pardon?”

Jonah Hyante lowered her fan and let out a high-pitched laugh.

“Oh-hohoho, think about it. If the Crow Knights, with Orleans’ Young Lord, have taken in a Drakan Rider, then shouldn’t the Blue Rose Knights, led by Young Lord Klein, be given something equally significant?”

“Ah…!”

“Aren’t they both imperial knight orders? There’s only one of her, and you can’t split a symbol in two.”

Oh no! Baroness Gachell quickly shut her mouth, while her daughter, Barbara, struggled to keep a neutral expression. Yet inside, she was drowning in despair.

Mother still doesn’t understand. Or does she, and she’s just pretending not to? No matter how hard we try, our family will never belong to that circle. At best, we’ll be mocked or used as a disposable pawn in their schemes. How much longer do I have to live like this? Forever? Even after I die? 

‘I’m sick of it.’

She knew exactly why her mother had brought up the Drakan Rider just now.

That mage, the one who had helped rescue their carriage from the mud during the Fruit Festival, was now the Drakan Rider. Pinkish hair and eyes as fresh as budding green leaves; it had to be her. Her appearance had been unforgettable.

Mother must have wanted to use that brief encounter to take control of the conversation. But… her efforts had just crumbled to dust.

From now on, Marchioness Hyante would be entirely focused on provoking the House of Orleans. She would stop at nothing to achieve that.

……

(T/N: Oh my, our almighty dragon is hopelessly in love, what can he do 🤭)