Chapter 18
The guest Evelyn had welcomed out of kindness turned into a monster while she was away. In her absence, he attacked the people of the monastery and drove them all to their deaths.
He must have awakened suddenly, transformed into a monster, and attacked the children who had no idea what was happening.
The children probably screamed in fear, crying out for Evelyn to come save them.
Lasagna, who couldn’t even move on her own, must have forced herself up to protect them—only to become another target.
Or maybe she had already been bitten by one of the infected children.
“When I arrived, they had all been infected. Everyone had turned into monsters. Only Remo had barely survived. But before I could do anything, he ran straight toward one of the monsters. He said he wasn’t scared, that he would protect his sister.”
For the first time, Evelyn looked Chaser directly in the eyes.
Her face went pale as the shock began to sink in.
Chaser, quietly watching her expression, continued.
“I had to stop them before they reached the village. I knew they wouldn’t want to harm anyone, so I didn’t hesitate. That’s when I saw the original monster escaping. I chased after it, and that’s when I met you and Jerry.”
Though his explanation was calm and detailed, only one thing echoed in Evelyn’s mind, over and over again:
You brought the monster that killed them.
Yes, it was Evelyn. She had been the one who led everyone to that horrible end.
How could anyone be so careless, so foolish?
Guilt and despair surrounded her like chains, squeezing the breath from her lungs.
Her breathing grew shallow, as if she were suffocating.
“I shouldn’t have said all this to someone who just woke up. You’re not well. I’ll call the doctor. Just lie down and rest.”
Chaser gently helped her lie back down on the bed, then quickly left the room.
The darkness she saw in her dream was the weight of her guilt.
It felt like she was being crushed under the pressure, barely able to breathe.
Lying still, the faces of the people who had cried in pain and begged for help filled her mind again.
With trembling limbs, she slowly got up and opened the door. No one was standing guard outside.
Her tear-filled eyes stared blankly at the dark, empty hallway before she suddenly began to run.
The place that had once saved her from the Luisa trials and helped her build a new life had crumbled like a sandcastle.
The monastery had been her past, her present, and the place where she dreamed of her future. Now, it was all gone.
And she had destroyed it with her own hands.
Was there even any reason to stay alive?
If the future only holds more pain… then maybe, just maybe…
Evelyn kept running, staring straight ahead.
Her destination was the highest point of the building.
There, she would follow her monastery family.
She had to.
A sinner like her didn’t deserve to live in this world anymore.
Her life might be worthless, but this was all she had left to give.
Yes, she didn’t need to beg someone else to end it for her.
She had to pay for her sins herself.
As she ran down the hallway, she didn’t see a single soul.
The quiet darkness around her brought back memories—fleeting moments of happiness she would never experience again, like mirages passing her by.
“My name is Lasagna. What’s yours, dear?”
“Evelyn, the weather is so nice. Want to go on a picnic with me?”
“Even if everyone else leaves, I’ll always stay by your side, so don’t be afraid.”
“You said crowded places scared you, right? Here, wear this necklace—it’ll help hide your beautiful blonde hair.”
“Why am I so kind to you? Oh, that’s easy. It’s because I like you. Evelyn, you’re like a daughter to me. I just want you to be happy.”
Those warm voices echoed in her ears, only to fade into silence.
Lasagna had been more than just kind. She had been like a parent, a teacher, a friend.
“My name is Allen. I’m happy to meet you, sister!”
Allen, who had become her little brother, always mature beyond his years.
“Hi, I’m Lize. I’m Remo’s sister.”
“I’m Remo, Lize’s younger brother.”
The cheerful twins, left at the monastery gates, who never lost their smiles despite their situation.
“It’s okay not to have a mom. As long as you’re with me, I’m fine.”
Susan, who spoke such brave words for someone so young.
“Sister, this is a secret, but… I like you the most!”
Even Jerry, the youngest, whom Evelyn had brought in herself.
She had worked so hard to build that precious family.
And it had all been destroyed by one act of kindness or rather, by her mistake.
They were gone. She would never see them again.
“It should’ve been me. I should’ve died instead.”
If she had known things would turn out like this, she should’ve ignored the sick man.
No, she should’ve been the one who got bitten in Jerry’s place.
Why didn’t I go to the guest room that day?
If I had known things would end up like this, if I had known everything would be taken away, I never would have made that choice.
Evelyn stood still, her breath uneven and rough.
She had run without stopping, and now she found herself on the top floor of the building. She opened the nearest door and walked into the room, where a terrace led to the open night.
Stepping outside, the sharp winter wind hit her like a blade, cutting across her skin.
Her necklace must have snapped at some point. The golden hair, no longer hidden by the enchantment, whipped wildly in the air. It was her real hair, yet it felt unfamiliar.
The moon had disappeared behind the clouds, leaving the night darker and colder. Only the wind, lonely and heavy, stayed by her side.
She looked down. It seemed to be about four or five stories high.
The ground below was stone. If she fell headfirst, it would be over in an instant.
Another gust of wind struck her face.
“…Ha, haha…”
Only then, after feeling the sting of the cold, did she truly realize that this moment was real. No more running from it.
Tears, long held back, began falling down her cheeks.
She wasn’t afraid of dying.
What terrified her was continuing to live, completely alone.
That was why death didn’t scare her. These tears were not because she feared the end, but because of the guilt that had rooted itself deep in her heart.
Do I even deserve to feel guilty?
Her voice was quiet as she looked up at the sky and whispered.
“This is strange, Sister. I don’t even deserve to cry, so why can’t I stop these tears?”
She wished someone would answer.
But here, in her final moment, there was only silence.
It made sense. Everyone who might have answered was already gone.
“…Maybe that’s better. If someone had answered, I might have hesitated.”
She let out a small laugh. It wasn’t joyful. It was a smile of surrender.
Evelyn didn’t bother wiping her tears. She simply pushed her hair and her clothes behind her shoulders and grabbed the edge of the terrace.
She slowly stepped over, placing her feet carefully on the narrow ledge, balancing at the very edge.
“…It’s not even guilt, not really…”
Her voice faded. She bit her lower lip.
“No, I don’t want to say anything anymore.”
The wind scattered her tears.
Her hands, gripping the railing, trembled as the wind pushed against her.
Even though they weren’t bound by blood, those people had been her family. They had brought her happiness, and not once had she regretted being with them.
She just hoped they knew how much she had loved them.
Now, it was time to pay for her mistake.
The wind stirred again, swirling around her body.
Feeling the chill settle into her bones, Evelyn closed her eyes.
“I’ll see you soon.”
She wished, as her tears vanished into the night, that her feelings would somehow reach them.
Her grip started to loosen.
With nothing left to hold onto, her body slowly leaned forward. She didn’t try to stop it.
She had decided.
But just before gravity could pull her down, a voice tore through the air.
“What do you think you’re doing!”
Someone grabbed her waist and pulled her back with force.
Her body, falling forward, was suddenly yanked upward. She hit the terrace railing, and a muffled cry escaped from her lips.
“Ah…”
“Have you completely lost your mind? Were you actually going to jump?”
The voice was so familiar she didn’t even need to look.
Slowly, Evelyn turned her head.
She could finally see him, holding her tightly, his body half over the railing in an effort to reach her.
Chaser.
His usual composed appearance was gone. His hair and clothes were a mess, and he looked like he had run here without a second thought, just to stop her.
It was surprising.
Chaser, who had once seemed so indifferent, the one who could joke even while holding her life in his hands, had come running to save her.
“I…”
He could tell she wanted to say something, so he waited.
But Evelyn closed her mouth again.
She said nothing. She just stared at him, her eyes filled with despair. Her face was trembling, like she might burst into tears at any second.
Chaser glanced down and noticed her feet were still on the edge of the ledge.
He let out a deep sigh.
She was still in danger. She could jump again at any moment. He had to get her inside.
So he softened his voice and tried to comfort her.
“It’s dangerous. Come inside first. Then we can talk.”
Evelyn shook her head and looked away. Chaser’s voice sharpened just slightly.
“Stop this foolishness. Come down from there now.”
“But…”
“You said you wanted to live. Are you really going to throw away the life you fought so hard to protect?”
His tone became gentle again.
But Evelyn answered with a scream, her voice raw and broken.
“I don’t have a reason to live anymore!”
The wind rushed between them, cold and sharp.
