Chapter 31: Quagmire (6)
Chapter 31: Quagmire (6)
Two days had passed. A directive came down from the military command: all uninjured soldiers who had participated in the battle, where Ariel had also fought, were to be granted leave. Ariel’s team received a week off.
Before going their separate ways to enjoy their time off, they agreed to visit their injured teammates in the infirmary.
“May the blessings of the divine always be with you.”
After stating their affiliation and purpose, they were granted entry to the temple, receiving the priests’ blessings as they passed. Since the temple was located near the military base, one wing of the large building was dedicated specifically to a military infirmary.
Thanks to the kind guidance of a priest, they were able to find their injured teammates without much trouble.
“Hey, I heard you all got leave!”
The first to greet them was Xenon, his left arm wrapped tightly in bandages. Waving his uninjured right hand with enthusiasm, he was the first to welcome them.
Xenon had injured his shoulder while trying to protect Ariel when Joshua’s magic shattered under the giant’s spell. He had fallen awkwardly and twisted it. Despite the injury, he had been forced to fire his gun with that very arm. The recoil from the shot had completely wrecked his already-damaged shoulder.
Following Xenon’s greeting, the other two conscious teammates, previously preoccupied, noticed their visitors and greeted them as well. One teammate remained unconscious.
After brief greetings, they moved toward the beds of those they were closer to.
They placed get-well gifts beneath each patient’s bed, and Lombard sat on the edge of Xenon’s bed, crossing his legs and folding his arms. With a dry expression, he looked Xenon up and down before asking,
“You alright?”
“Of course, of course. Just two more days of treatment and I’ll be as good as new.”
“Talk about rotten luck. You’ve barely joined the military and already your body’s a wreck.”
Xenon waved his good hand dismissively.
“Come on, in that situation, this is actually lucky. I didn’t die, after all.”
“Hmph.”
“Honestly, joining this team was a stroke of luck. Sis Rel and Bro Josh are just… amazing…”
Lombard’s gaze lingered intently on Xenon. His piercing stare, sharp enough to cut through steel, made the smile fade from Xenon’s face. Avoiding eye contact, Xenon shrank slightly and pulled his injured shoulder inward. It quivered faintly.
“…But to be honest, it was scary. I mean, I knew it’d be dangerous, but actually being in it… I really thought I was going to die.”
“I figured as much.”
Lombard finally nodded, as if the words he’d been waiting for had arrived. Xenon scratched his cheek sheepishly, realizing he’d been seen through completely.
“I don’t know how to explain it. I came in ready to die, or so I thought. But once I really believed I might die…”
“If you know your life’s worth something, then quit. Before you’re crippled or dead.”
“…”
Lombard’s voice was firm, unwavering, and heavy with meaning. Xenon fell silent, as if struck by some profound realization.
Watching their conversation from nearby, Ariel felt an emotion she couldn’t quite name as she looked at Xenon’s dazed expression.
That smile… she had thought it was genuine. But it had merely been a mask to hide his fear, and that realization hit her hard.
How had Lombard seen through that?
In her mind, she recalled Aynkel, who had smiled in front of others, only to later sit alone, trembling with fear, writing letters he would never send.
Back then, she had known nothing.
‘If only I had seen the fear behind his smile and said something to him…’
Would he have lived? Would he be smiling beside her now?
A deep, aching pain pulsed in Ariel’s chest once again.
* * *
After their visit to the temple infirmary, Ariel’s team headed for the pharmacy where Joshua was being treated. Since magic users couldn’t be healed by divine power, the only option was medicinal treatment. The pharmacy was about a ten-minute walk from the temple.
On the way there, Ariel walked with her head hung low, the lingering impact of Lombard and Xenon’s conversation weighing heavily on her. The wave of self-reproach was overwhelming.
Walking beside her, Lombard kept casting glances her way. After a brief hesitation, he finally spoke.
“Ariel.”
Though she was lost in thought, she wasn’t so distracted that she missed the sound of her name. She slowly raised her head and looked at Lombard, whose strange gaze studied the dark shadows behind her eyes before he spoke.
“Did Xenon’s words make you think about anything?”
His tone was more cautious than when he had spoken to Xenon. Ariel didn’t respond; she simply looked at him.
She had a lot on her mind. Lombard, who had a knack for seeing emotions invisible to others, surely knew exactly how she felt. So why ask? She continued to stare at him silently.
When no answer came, Lombard went on.
“Truthfully, I want to tell you the same thing I told him. I may not know exactly why you’re here, but I’ve seen what you’re capable of. You’ve got the skill to channel your emotions into power, but even so, you’re not well-suited for the battlefield.”
“…”
“You might not feel it now because your emotions are too loud. But when a crisis comes, one so intense it drowns out those emotions, you’ll regret coming here. Of course, judging by how you survived the last battle, I’m not even sure if such a crisis will come for you…”
“How do you know that?”
Ariel suddenly interrupted him, not in sarcasm, but out of genuine curiosity.
Lombard frowned slightly, as if unsure how to answer, and shook his head.
“I don’t know… It’s hard to explain when you ask like that. It’s just something I see. Call it experience. I’ve been in war long enough. I’ve seen plenty of people come and go. And I’ve seen plenty like you.”
She had believed she had nothing left to live for. She had come here thinking that even dying wouldn’t matter. But now he was saying she’d regret it when the time came?
A word that felt utterly distant from her passed through her lips.
“Regret…”
“Survival instinct is far more powerful than you’d imagine.”
As if reading her mind, Lombard added that comment. Ariel then recalled what he had initially told her – to reflect on Xenon’s words.
I thought I was prepared to die, Xenon had said. But when I thought I actually might, I was terrified. His words, unfinished, had ended in a trembling voice and fear-stricken face.
“…”
But even with that memory in mind…
“…I don’t know. Not yet.”
She hadn’t experienced that sensation for herself yet, and so couldn’t relate. Ariel shook her head slightly. Lombard’s reply, considering how gently he’d tried to broach the topic, was remarkably even.
“I see. If that’s how you feel. It’s your choice, after all.”
Their conversation ended there.
* * *
“Wow, quite the crowd. Did you bring presents?”
With an IV drip in his arm, Joshua greeted them with a dazzling smile that made the most of his handsome face. When he was first admitted, he’d looked deathly pale, but now, his complexion had returned to normal.
The moment Ariel saw him looking healthy, the pounding in her chest that had begun the moment they entered the pharmacy finally calmed. A rush of relief washed over her. And in the aftermath of that emotion, her voice came out colder than she intended.
“Looks like you’re ready to be discharged.”
At the frosty tone, Joshua’s gaze shifted to her. He wiped the smile from his face and, with eyes more radiant than amethysts, stared at her quietly for a moment before breaking back into a grin.
“Wow, sounds like someone was really worried about me. I’m touched!”
What he said next was enough to leave her speechless.
“…”
Ariel’s brows furrowed slightly. But she couldn’t refute him because he wasn’t wrong. She had been more shocked than anyone when he collapsed from exhaustion after the battle, even after the danger had passed.
Despite herself, she kept seeing Aynkel in him. When she had seen Joshua crumple like a puppet with its strings cut, her heart had nearly stopped. It was as if someone had whispered, This is how Aynkel died.
Though she had quickly realized he was still alive, the feeling in that fleeting moment had been so intense she could still recall it vividly if she tried.
“I want to be discharged too, but they said I need to stay one more day.”
Joshua smiled and cracked open the box of drinks they’d brought him as a gift, handing out bottles to each team member. He looked completely carefree, as if nothing had happened.
You’d never guess he’d nearly died. He hadn’t changed at all.
In the midst of the cheerful atmosphere, a stray thought suddenly and inexplicably flickered through Ariel’s mind.
