Chapter 3
Loelle
Yesterday, when you left without saying a word, I thought it was the end. But then, not only did Cassien visit the Count today, but he also stayed by my side all day long.
And he even stayed at the mansion until dinner, making Peria prepare the evening meal.
“Loelle, are you feeling unwell?”
“Huh? No… I’m fine.”
But just like yesterday, I couldn’t outright kick Cassien out.
Even though I was in a position where I wouldn’t escape unscathed if the engagement were broken, if Peria found out that I was the one who suggested ending the engagement…
‘I might really die.’
If I didn’t want to die before fleeing from my family, I had to make the best of it with Cassien right now. I quietly picked at my food.
Then, for the first time in a while, Peria smiled and said,
“I think it wouldn’t be so bad if the three of us dined together like this sometimes.”
Her tone was so kind, almost generous, even though she was speaking to my fiancé.
It was probably because Cassien was the only heir to the Ersian Marquis family that she liked him so much, and most likely because…
‘The fact that he’s known as a ladies’ man in the empire is what really appeals to her.’
Even if I ran away from the Ivelle family, I’d surely be unhappy if I married Cassien.
Just like her.
“Yes, I heard the Marquis and his wife are doing well?”
“They’re always doing well, as usual.”
“I’m glad to hear that. Oh, by the way… I heard they went on a trip.”
“Yes, it’s not far, so I think they’ll be back earlier than expected.”
I answered as Peria continued to cut the meat and resumed the conversation.
“By the way, isn’t it about time for you to get married?”
Today, Cassien was sweet, acting like he would do anything for me.
But even for Cassien, there was one thing that was absolutely non-negotiable: marriage.
‘Right. We’re destined to end up together, anyway.’
It wasn’t a big deal, since I already knew that.
But then Cassien said,
“Now, it’s really about time we got married.”
His sudden bombshell made me cough. Cassien kindly patted my back.
“Loelle, what’s wrong? Are you choking?”
“Cough! Cough, cough-!”
Peria, ignoring my coughing, elegantly smiled and continued the conversation.
“I’m glad we’re on the same page about this.”
“We were planning to discuss the marriage as soon as my parents return.”
“Oh, that’s great. When do you think the Marquis and his wife will be back?”
Cassien answered Peria question while continuing to rub my back.
The talk of marriage and his actions were both unfamiliar to me, making my cough linger.
After dinner, at Peria insistence, Cassien and I took a walk in the garden. A quiet stroll with my ex-fiancé after we’d ended things. This was the worst kind of torment.
As soon as we reached a place where we wouldn’t be easily seen by the servants, I pulled my hand away from Cassien.
“Why are you doing this?”
“Loelle, why are you upset again?”
“Do you really not know?”
I frowned heavily, and Cassien reached out and grabbed my hand again. Then, in the softest voice, he said,
“Is it because I suggested we postpone the marriage? I’m sorry. But now, I really don’t want to delay the wedding anymore.”
After acting so indifferently because of his affair with Verodica, he seemed to think my anger was because of our wedding.
“I’m sorry. So, please…”
“I told you I wanted to break off the engagement, Cassien.”
Cassien, who had been holding my hand, stopped moving. Then, with a firm grip, he pulled me close.
“You… were you serious about that?”
He still had that usual smile on his face. But I could tell whether Cassien was genuinely smiling or if he was just putting on a more convincing smile to hide his true feelings.
It was the latter.
As if confirming my thoughts, Cassien eyes filled with a chill.
“Loelle. I asked if you were serious.”
Startled by the look I’d never seen before, I tried to step back. But Cassien pulled me closer, making us even more pressed against each other.
So, is Cassien angry with me now…?
‘Why?’
While I questioned it, Cassien clasped my hands together and intertwined our fingers, making it harder for me to escape.
“Loelle, what are you doing… Huh? How can we just break up?”
Then, he fully embraced me. With his cheek against my head, he nuzzled me as if to act cute.
“I won’t do this anymore… So, can you stop being angry?”
“Loelle…”
I froze in shock from his unusually affectionate behavior. But soon, I snapped out of it and pushed Cassien away.
“Don’t… Don’t touch me, Cassien.”
Cassien stayed frozen in place, as if shocked by being pushed away. Strangely, just seeing him like this made my heart waver. My heart softened, and I turned my head slightly and continued speaking.
“You probably didn’t get it, so I’ll say it again. I don’t ever want to see you again.”
“What…?”
“You were always with other women, and I’m sick of worrying whether you’ll leave me. So, I just want to… I want to end everything.”
“I don’t want to be by your side anymore, Cassien.”
In that moment, all expression left Cassien face.
He didn’t frown, nor did he raise his voice in anger. But he looked more furious than ever.
Was he angry because he never expected to hear those words from someone he thought would never break up with him?
“If you don’t believe it… you can tell everyone that you broke up with me. I don’t care…”
“Loelle.”
“You…! I knew from the beginning that you didn’t really like me… I’ve known.”
“I kept holding on, thinking maybe one day you’d look back at me…”
Not even a glance, let alone attention.
“Cassien. Please, stop this.”
I knew this would happen eventually, but I couldn’t help but feel a pang of sadness.
I stood still, looking at the frozen Cassien, and slowly started walking back to the mansion. But then, Cassien caught up with me, walking fast, and suddenly embraced me from behind.
“Cassien!”
“Loelle, I’m sorry.”
“I was wrong. All of it, Loelle.”
When Cassien scent hit me, I couldn’t help but freeze for a moment. He placed his hands over mine, then slowly slid them down to my waist.
Cassien rarely initiated physical contact.
So why was he doing this now? I was confused and startled.
Honestly, I felt a little shaken. The image of him loving me, something I had imagined during our four years of engagement, seemed to come to life.
But behind that shaky feeling was the overwhelming sadness and bitterness.
In the end, this was just another version of love—something everyone could fall into. I knew that better than anyone, but I couldn’t help but feel disgusted with myself for trying to turn away from the truth.
Cassien, sensing my tension, spoke in a pitiful voice.
“Please forgive me, Loelle… I won’t do this again.”
“Stop, Cassien.”
“I’ll do anything. So, please forgive me…”
At that moment, I remembered the desperate scene of Cassien clinging to Iris in the novel.
The scenes where he sincerely regretted and begged for forgiveness, confessing his love with intensity. Did he have that much affection for me? Or was it just out of obligation?
Either way, asking didn’t really matter.
‘After all, you still love Iris…’
“I… love you.”
“So… don’t go.”
It was a strange thing. The first time I ever heard those words, it was only now, as I thought of Iris. It felt as if he was declaring that no matter what, he would end up loving Iris.
As if someone had thrown cold water on me, my heart grew cold.
“Cassien.”
When I called his name, a glimmer of light flickered in his red eyes.
I briefly looked into his eyes, then spoke emotionlessly.
“Don’t ever appear in front of me again.”
Today, there’s a ball at the imperial palace.
This ball is to celebrate the Emperor’s daughter, Iris, being crowned as Princess, and it’s also the day when the male lead, Cassien, first meets the female lead, Iris.
‘I bet Cassien will fall in love with Iris at first sight at this ball.’
As I absentmindedly stared at the hall, my friend Emily tapped my shoulder.
“Loelle. Where’s Cassien?”
“Huh?”
“Cassien hasn’t come yet?”
Next to me, Roshan spoke up.
“Are you really going to marry him? What’s so good about a guy who only makes your life miserable?”
“I broke up with him.”
“Yeah, you broke up… what?”
Roshan’s eyes widened in surprise, as if he hadn’t expected it.
“I broke up with Cassien.”
“Who?”
Roshan asked in disbelief, as if he couldn’t understand.
“Who else? Me and Cassien.”
“You… You, you! That jerk dumped you? Ha! What did he do to dump you? If anyone should be calling it off, it should’ve been you! What an idiot!”
Roshan, of course, assumed I was dumped.
Well, considering how I’d acted up until now, it wasn’t surprising.
I replied to Roshan, who was still angrily ranting about Cassien.
“I was the one who broke up with him.”
“You?”
“Yeah, I did.”
Just as we exchanged a look of disbelief, the soldiers guarding the entrance of the ballroom suddenly called out loudly.
“Duke Rochester is here!”
The villain of the original story, and the one responsible for my death—Reus Rochester had arrived.
