Chapter 038
The baker’s loud voice echoed sharply along the street.
As I watched, I started walking in the direction the man had disappeared.
Caelan, who was following me, grabbed my arm and urged me to stop.
“Um, madam. If you go that way, you’ll end up outside the square. It’s better if you stay here…”
“Why?”
He looked flustered, as if he was trying to hide something.
‘Evan had also told me not to go outside the square earlier.’
Seeing Caelan unable to answer only intensified my curiosity.
Eventually, I followed the path the man had taken, which led to a narrow alley.
Behind me, Caelan muttered, “Ah, this isn’t good…”
‘What on earth is he worried about?’
Finally emerging from the alley, I was met with a shocking sight.
“What the…?”
I stammered, looking around.
On the dirty street lay people, drained of life and sprawled helplessly.
Unlike those in the square who were working to restore the fallen buildings, the ones here merely stared blankly at the sky, covered by tattered tents.
‘How can there be such a difference within the same estate?’
The vibrant market square was a stark contrast to this place, which was filled with the smell of death.
While I was at a loss for words, my gaze locked with a woman sitting in a corner.
In an instant, her dull eyes gained focus, and she suddenly rushed towards me.
“Please, just a penny! Help me!”
Then she knelt at my feet, rubbing her hands together in desperation as she begged.
As the woman’s voice grew louder, the other people in the area began to gather around me, drawn in by her cries.
From people limping with injuries to those wrapped in bandages,
“Please, just some food.”
“Help me, just once…”
I quickly found myself surrounded by a crowd, wondering where they all came from.
“Everyone, please calm down! The war is over!”
Caelan stood in front of them, but I remained frozen in place as if turned to stone.
The faces of those who had approached me were vividly etched in my mind.
These people weren’t truly looking at me.
Their vacant stares felt as if they were trapped somewhere far away.
“Alright, please go back now.”
As Caelan continued to soothe and coax, the crowd slowly began to disperse.
Watching their retreating figures, I asked Caelan in a trembling voice, “Caelan, why are these people begging here…”
The war was over, and each estate was in the process of rebuilding.
I believed there were sufficient resources being provided for that.
So why were these people in such a state?
“Well…”
Caelan, initially hesitant to answer, finally spoke slowly.
“It seems that even though the war is over, the memories of it are still very much alive for them.”
“…”
“The people you saw in the square are those who are trying to overcome their pain and live again. This place is where those who have not yet healed from the scars of war gather, having lost their will to live.”
He said that the ducal castle is currently providing all the necessary resources to help the people of the territory become self-sufficient.
However, many of those I had just seen were trapped in the horrific nightmares they had experienced, unable to think clearly.
Thump.
As I quietly listened to his story, it felt like my heart sank.
“So, is there no way for those people to get better?”
“No one knows. Those who have lost the meaning of life need to find another reason to live, but they don’t have that right now.”
Seeing the shocked expression on my face, Caelan softly added, “I think it’s best if you return to the castle now.”
Only then did I realize why Evan and Caelan had warned me against going outside the plaza.
‘They must have known I would be shocked to see this.’
I had lived my whole life as a noble, never having faced any hardship.
Even during the severe food shortages caused by five years of war, I only heard about the extent of the damage through others, living a sheltered life.
Although I lived in the same country, I had no understanding of the weight of war at all.
To be honest, even when I heard what Nora, the headmaid, had said the day before, I didn’t really get it.
Had I really tried to understand the pain and suffering of those who had been affected by the war?
Those who lost precious family must live with scars for the rest of their lives.
“Ah…”
As I reached that thought, I raised my hand to cover my mouth.
At that moment, tears flowed from my eyes, tracing a path through the air before falling to the ground.
“M-Madam? This sight is too shocking, isn’t it? Let’s hurry back to the castle!”
Caelan, watching me from the side, looked flustered and didn’t know what to do.
“No, it’s not that…”
I started to speak but choked up, unable to continue.
I felt too ashamed of myself.
What was the difference between me and the nobles they so despised?
A naïve noblewoman who has only encountered the pain of war through books.
Surely, those in the castle thought the same.
Drip, drip.
The tears wouldn’t stop, and I stood frozen in place, gasping for breath.
It was then.
“What in the world is going on here?”
A familiar voice came from behind me.
“Oh, you’re back!”
“I told you to keep her safe; why are you making her cry on the street?”
Caelan’s apologetic voice followed Evan’s low, gravelly tone.
“I’m sorry, it’s all my fault. I should have been more careful.”
Worried that Caelan would suffer because of me, I quickly brushed myself off and stood up.
“Caelan hasn’t done anything wrong.”
I wiped my damp cheeks roughly and stepped toward Evan.
“It’s just my problem.”
“What made you cry?”
His gaze remained fixed on my tear-streaked face.
Feeling embarrassed to tell him the truth, I weakly shook my head and replied, “It’s nothing.”
“If it’s nothing, then why…”
He seemed frustrated with my answer, raising his voice before quickly sealing his lips as if to suppress his anger.
Moments later, he pulled a handkerchief from his pocket and began to wipe my face vigorously.
“What—ugh…!”
“Wipe your tears and then talk. Were you always this tearful?”
His rough touch wiping my messed-up face made the tears I had been shedding disappear completely.
His touch was still rough, but it was gentler than before.
Eventually, the handkerchief fell away from my face, and my eyes met Evan’s.
Since he was leaning down to wipe my face, I could gaze directly into his gray eyes.
Just then, I thought about how those eyes had a strange charm that could captivate anyone.
“…Do you like candy?”
“Yes?”
I was taken aback by his sudden question and could only stare at him with wide eyes.
He cleared his throat a few times, seeming a bit embarrassed as he turned his head and muttered, “I guess that made you stop crying.”
I wanted to ask how old the person was who had their tears stopped, but I was exhausted from crying, so I nodded and answered.
“Yes, I like it.”
‘Then let’s hurry back. I saw a shop selling candy on the way here.’
Following his lead, I began to walk away from this place.
midori
thanks! aw, awkward guy trying his best!