Chapter 22

Hic, hngh. Calix…

Please… don’t leave me.

Please…

Without you, I… I…

It was in that moment, when I was desperately pleading to a man I could not even hold on to, that it happened. Just as I let out a sob, nearly breaking into wails, and my mind began to grow hazy, I heard something.

—El.

At first, it was too faint to make out the words. But the voice grew clearer and clearer, and I realized it was a familiar voice calling out to me. And then, I woke up.

“Ariel.”

Calix’s voice…

“Ariel.”

The voice I couldn’t hear even once in the dream now reached me clearly, and I jolted awake. There he was, looking down at me with a slight furrow in his handsome brows.

“Calix…?”

My voice came out a little hoarse, probably because I’d just woken up.

“What kind of dream did you have?”

“…Huh?”

“What kind of dream makes you cry like that?”

He gently traced beneath my eyes as he asked. At his words, I instinctively brought my hand to my face. My fingertips came away damp, so it wasn’t a lie.

“…Was I crying in my sleep?”

Calix didn’t reply, he just nodded.

“Ah…”

That’s when his face came into full view. His eyes, as they looked at me, were filled with tenderness. So different from the cold, heartless gaze he’d given me in the dream.

“Calix.”

Still overwhelmed by Ariel’s emotions from the dream, I reached out and wrapped my arms around his neck.

“Ariel.”

“Please… just stay like this. I’m begging you.”

Right now, more than anything, I didn’t want to be apart from him. I wished he would just hold me tight and never let go.

Maybe I looked shaken, because Calix said nothing and simply embraced me. Then, with a swift motion, he shifted our positions. Now, he was lying on the bed, and I was lying on top of him. But even that wasn’t enough.

I pressed closer, until there wasn’t even room for a sheet of paper between us. Through the fabric of his sleepwear, I could feel the solid contours of his body.

He began stroking my hair with soft, rhythmic movements. That cool, clean scent unique to him filled my senses, slowly easing my nerves.

And as the fog lifted from my mind, I realized what I’d done.

I’ve lost it. Completely lost it. No, this wasn’t my fault. Why did it have to be that dream?

Anyway, all of this, every action, every word, was Ariel’s doing, not mine. Which meant, now that I was back to my senses, it was time to clean up the mess.

‘What do I do now?’

How was I supposed to act like none of that just happened?

I tried to shift slightly to get off of him, but he pulled me even tighter into his arms. There was no getting down now.

After a moment’s thought, I looked up at him with resignation.

“Calix…”

“Have you calmed down now?”

“Yes, I’m okay now. You can let me go.”

I tried to push away, but he didn’t loosen his arms at all.

“Calix?”

I called him, puzzled, and his large hand cupped my face.

“What did you dream about?”

“Oh… I think it was a sad dream.”

“A sad dream?”

“Yes. It was really sad, but… I can’t remember it clearly.”

I gave a sheepish smile, hoping to brush it off.

“You can’t remember?”

“No. You know how dreams tend to fade the moment you wake up.”

The truth was, I remembered every detail.

The situation. His expression, the look in his eyes. And Ariel’s overwhelming grief and despair.

But I couldn’t tell him any of that. So I stuck to the excuse that I had forgotten.

“I forgot…”

But somehow, he didn’t seem to believe me. There was a faint irritation in his gaze, like he was displeased that I was hiding something from him.

“It’s true. Oh wait, I do remember one thing. You left. You went somewhere far away.”

Trying to dodge his suspicion, I took a small piece of the dream and twisted it.

“I went far away?”

“Yes. And I wasn’t allowed to go with you. So…”

I summoned the sadness from earlier, letting my voice tremble.

“I begged you to take me with you…”

To sell the act, I buried my face against his chest.

“But you left me behind. That’s why… it was so painful.”

At that, silence fell.

Calix didn’t speak, and a heavy stillness filled the room.

That quiet, full of unspoken meaning, only made my nerves worse. Especially when you’d just told a lie and the person you lied to wasn’t saying anything. Not being able to see his expression made it even more unbearable.

I was just about to say something else when Calix cupped my cheeks and gently lifted my face. But even as I met his crimson eyes, I couldn’t read a thing. He was always so hard to read.

“Calix?”

I called his name cautiously. Still, he said nothing and just stared at me. I opened my mouth to speak again, but stopped. Talking too much now would only make things worse.

So I waited in silence until, at last, he spoke.

“I would never leave you.”

“I know.”

His voice was firm, unwavering, just like always. I nodded instinctively.

“That’s why it was just a dream. It had to be…”

Truthfully, it wasn’t just a dream. It was a glimpse of what was to come.

“No. Even in a dream, I would never leave you.”

Even in a dream, a world no one can control, he wouldn’t go. He said it with such conviction, and it was so like him that I couldn’t argue.

Instead, I just smiled.

“Yes. Never leave me. Always stay by my side.”

“Ariel.”

His face slowly moved closer. I closed my eyes. And so, once again, our night began.

* * *

A few days later, I was finally given a chance to leave the palace. It was to visit the Temple, a trip Ariel had made regularly in the past to offer prayers. Whenever she visited, she prayed for Calix’s health and well-being… and to bear his child.

The temple wasn’t far from the imperial palace, and the schedule was short: just a visit and then back. Still, the thought of leaving the palace, a place I’d long felt trapped in, had filled me with excitement since yesterday.

‘What does the outside look like?’

I was so curious to see what this world looked like beyond the palace walls. Sure, I had bits and pieces from Ariel’s memories, but she’d entered the palace at a young age and hardly left except for temple visits.

So if there was time, I hoped to take a little stroll through the capital after stopping by the temple.

“Your Imperial Highness, everything is ready. Shall we go?”

“Yes. Let’s go.”

I followed the nursemaid out of the palace and saw the carriage waiting. Before climbing in, I cast a quick glance toward Calix’s quarters.

As expected, he hadn’t been there when I woke up late this morning. Still, maybe he remembered I was going out today because last night, he’d been unusually restrained.

‘Well… restrained for him.’

At any rate, thanks to consistent training, my stamina had improved significantly, and I was in top condition.

“Let’s go.”

“Yes, Your Imperial Highness.”

At my command, the carriage began to move.

I kept my eyes glued to the window, taking in the sights. Soon, we passed through the grand gates of the palace and entered a massive plaza. It was so vast that it could accommodate all the citizens of the empire during major events.

And beyond the plaza, the bustling streets of the capital.

‘Wow…’

Seeing people who didn’t live in the palace felt like witnessing something completely new. Buildings of varying heights lined both sides of the road, and for the first time, it felt like I was somewhere people truly lived.

‘This is where I’ll live from now on…’

Even if I didn’t settle in the capital after leaving the palace, most places would probably look similar to this. Unlike the palace residents, these people were vibrant, full of life and somehow, that made me look forward to the new life awaiting me.

I kept my eyes fixed on the view until we left the main streets and entered a quieter forest path.

“You seem happy.”

My nanny had noticed and smiled as our eyes met.

“Hm? Ah, I guess it feels nice to be out for a change.”

“Is your body okay? No discomfort?”

“I’m fine. How much farther to the temple?”

“Once we get through this forest path, it won’t be long.”

I gave a small nod and turned back to the window. With every breath, the crisp air of the forest filled my lungs, fresh and cool, like a blessing.

……

T/N: We do have those kinds of dreams sometimes