Chapter 10: What It Means to Become Real
Her calm murmur and faint smile irritated him. Why did her face, looking up at him, seem different than usual? Had that woman trampled her pride again with her angelic face?
Well. Such words must have been exchanged. That’s the kind of woman Davira Claudia was. A hypocritical and cruel woman who cultivated herself and preserved her chastity in the name of waiting for him, who established high values and mercilessly cut down anything that didn’t conform.
No, perhaps it would be more accurate to call her a woman unaware of her own malice.
After carefully examining her expression, he took off his jacket and draped it over Lyra’s shoulders. His first concern was to do something about those pathetically trembling shoulders, but at that moment, Lyra suddenly grabbed his hand as he was adjusting the collar.
“Would you like to dance with me?”
“Here? I think we should go inside first.”
“No, right now… I like it here.”
Kaylon looked down at her steady gaze, then wrapped his arm around her slender waist as if agreeing to her request. When he felt no warmth in her hand as they joined palms, his brow furrowed slightly.
Looking at Lyra’s silent smile, he pulled her body even closer, as if trying to transfer his body heat to her. It resembled less a dancing posture and more an intimate rendezvous between lovers.
“This makes… it difficult to dance.”
As Lyra, her face flushed, tried to create some distance between them, Kaylon gripped her hand even more firmly.
“You can hardly dance properly in that condition anyway.”
He continued, skillfully shifting the blame for his desire onto her.
“How about a waltz?”
As the faint sound of music reached his ears, Kaylon moved his feet before even hearing her answer. As a result, Lyra, enveloped in his embrace, had to carefully step across the floor.
An uncomfortable dance, yet not entirely so. At least, that’s what Kaylon thought, and he assumed Lyra felt the same.
He had witnessed the blush spreading across her small face many times and had seen countless signs that she held him in her heart.
Even now. But…
‘So what?’
His gaze, which had been fixed on the top of her head, slowly traveled down her slender body that fit so perfectly in his arms.
The main cause of his torment all day. A lingering attachment that kept making him look down different paths despite having a predetermined route.
Even when he tried to close his eyes and ignore it, his gaze habitually sought her out.
Not just today. Though he thought he’d maintained his composure, his emotions finally erupted, crushing that worm Cody Ferret. Yet his anxiety, disguised as anger, wasn’t relieved—instead, he grew more agitated.
As if, in the end, he could only feel at ease by keeping her confined to his side.
A sigh escaped him. When his warm breath touched her delicate skin, flushed with tension, he felt her body stiffen. It was only natural for predatory desire to open its massive jaws. Their touching bodies grew hot, and reason could only chase after the incense of swelling heat and curves.
Feelings that could neither be contained nor accepted were nothing but a burden, yet emotions repeatedly discarded somehow always found their way back.
‘Damn it.’
A small curse lingered at the corner of his mouth before disappearing. Kaylon wished for the song to end quickly, conscious of his body responding all too honestly.
Just then, Lyra met his gaze and spoke.
“I have something to tell you.”
“Go ahead.”
He deliberately spoke gruffly to hide the turmoil inside him. Lyra’s shoulders immediately trembled slightly, but before long, she resumed her composed expression.
“Miss Claudia suspects there’s something between you and me.”
“…”
“The catalyst was probably my sister.”
“Your stepmother’s biological daughter?”
“Yes. I don’t know how the two became close, but… Miss Claudia seems to know more than I expected.”
An uncomfortable silence followed. Kaylon kept his gaze fixed on the rose-colored lips that repeatedly bit down then released. His nerves were on edge, not from Lyra’s careful words but from the soft flesh hidden inside those lips.
If I covered your lips with mine right now and inhaled deeply, what face would you make? In this quiet garden, if I laid you down like any lover would and grasped your round breasts firmly, what erotic moans would you let out?
After coating your fragrant body with my saliva and driving myself deep into your most intimate places, you would…
Even as she had been undressed countless times in his sordid mind and left sprawled messily on the floor, the real woman before him remained elegant, even her blinking golden eyelashes fluttering like a butterfly’s wings.
Moments later, Lyra, completely unaware of his wildly beating heart, spoke again.
“She seemed to know about the marriage discussions between me and Count Almar. So I wanted to tell you…”
When he simply shifted his gaze as if prompting her to continue, Lyra bit her lip slightly before continuing.
“I want to make our engagement real.”
“…”
“Is that… burdensome to you?”
The anxiety seeping through beneath her slightly raised eyelids was palpable. Kaylon, his expression now blank, murmured in a low voice.
“Burdensome… Why would you think that?”
“Because it seems natural that you would. After all, our contract only extends to me being your lover. You might think I’ve forgotten my place.”
“Lyra.”
Kaylon suddenly stopped moving and stared at her intently.
“Do you understand what it means to make the engagement real?”
“Yes. It means… ending the pretense.”
“And still you want to become my real fiancée?”
“…If you would allow it.”
Anxiety, agitation, unease. What else could be there? Kaylon instinctively realized it had become truly difficult to understand Lyra’s true feelings.
A faint fever shone in her eyes, but nothing more. He could tell that she wasn’t making this proposal because she wanted to be the Duchess.
Yet he couldn’t grasp why she had made this decision after her conversation with Davira Claudia.
The burden they would both have to bear was too great to make such a decision solely because of suspicion.
Then Lyra resolved his question.
“If the suspicion disappears, Miss Claudia will give up on you as well. Completing the mission as quickly as possible is the best way for you to be free.”
Her gaze, as if asking “isn’t that right?”, stared directly at him. Once again, he felt a tightness in his chest. What did he want to do with this woman? The answer he thought he knew, the feelings he believed he could simply act upon—cracks were forming.
The emotions he had to suppress dozens of times a day weighed heavily on him.
Not only did she irritate him to the point of anger, but as he had feared, she was like a poisonous plant, freely manipulating him.
In the end, Lyra Norris was nothing but toxic, even making him search for her simply because she’d disappeared from his sight for a moment.
“Make it real.”
Her faintly trembling voice urged him.
“…Duke.”
His unstable heart was helplessly drawn along.
Was this a test of him?
He couldn’t tell. But…
Those pale-colored eyes fixed on him terrified him more than ever.
“Let’s do that.”
Having slowly released her soft body from his embrace, he turned away coldly.
