Chapter 3.1

“Now then—name: Alexandria Colica. Current name: Alexandria Tellie. Age: fifty. Characteristics: vicious. Likes: her son. Dislikes: flies buzzing around her son.”

“……What is that?”

While the carriage rocked, Lilith adjusted my dress and asked carefully. The tension from learning I’d been called by the Empress left her so rigid she didn’t even squeal at my face the way she normally did.

I shrugged my shoulders with a bright smile and answered:

“Our Empress’s profile? You need to know your enemy to face them.”

What the Empress hates most are those who hover around the Crown Prince. In that sense, I won’t bother saying how much Rachel will be tormented by the Empress in the future.

Naturally, it was the Florence ducal house that pulled the strings behind the scenes, using the Colica ducal house to torment the female lead.

Thanks to that, the Colica ducal house gets annihilated by the Crown Prince for the crime of tormenting the female lead.

Ah, my husband is admirable.

I jolted at the sudden idea that crossed my mind. No, that’s not right. What if Rubellian ends up looking admirable here and now? I shook my head again. This doesn’t seem right.

As the carriage passed through the gates of the imperial palace, I peered out the window.

Just as I was momentarily mesmerized by the sight of the Empress’s palace that I was seeing for the first time in my life, the carriage suddenly stopped.

“Madam, please don’t be too nervous……”

“Hey, you’re more nervous.”

“Even if Her Majesty the Empress says anything, just let it go in one ear and out the other, don’t forget.”

“I can’t talk back?”

“She’s not someone who uses words. She starts with her hands like this…… Anyway, if there’s any danger, don’t forget to scream.”

Lilith said while drawing a full swing with one hand.

Her appearance was so amusing that I couldn’t help but chuckle. No, anyone watching would think I was being dragged off to a witch.

Soon I headed to the room where the Empress’s secret meeting was being held. At the end of a long, long corridor, the place where the Empress’s evil deeds were secretly carried out.

When the door opened, I stepped inside.

For a brief moment, I lost my composure as a firm hand pressed against my neck.

“How dare you hold your head so high? Are all Florence’s mistresses so devoid of grace? That house does nothing but bring in vulgar wenches, what more could one expect?”

Starting the main event without any warning? Couldn’t they at least give me a second to bow my head first?

I let out a deep sigh. It seemed my feeling that things were going strangely wasn’t my imagination after all.

Since my neck was pressed down as soon as I entered, I was unintentionally doing yoga. My legs were cramping, but who was this person still bending my neck?

From what I could see, it seemed to be one of the noble ladies who was a member of the Empress’s secret meeting.

While thinking it through, I carefully raised my eyes—any sudden movement might appear overly frantic…

“How dare this brazen girl lift her gaze, pretending concern for others’ safety!”

You were the one holding my neck down. If you question me for raising my eyes now, how exactly should I respond…

Just as I was thinking that, someone slapped my cheek.

Smack—!

At the pain flowing across my struck face, I squeezed my eyes shut. Still, since she was a noble lady who had lived delicately her whole life, it didn’t hurt that much, but naturally I felt bad.

Ah, making a living is damn hard.

“How about it, does getting hit once bring you to your senses?”

“I was already in my right mind.”

“Still not coming to your senses……!”

“No, you try having your neck pressed the moment you enter a room! Do you think you’d be in your right mind?”

In excessive anger, I shouted loudly.

If this were an official venue, I wouldn’t behave like this, but this was a secret meeting. What that meant was that while the Empress’s actions wouldn’t leak outside, whatever crazy thing I did also wouldn’t leak out.

Well, reputation and such were already buried three floors underground anyway, so it didn’t matter.

No, but thinking about it, this is really absurd.

Outside, the tale was a Western romance fantasy, but here, in this room, it was a story of sharp Eastern palace intrigue. The hand pressing my neck was unmistakably that of the Empress’s maid—or a similarly ruthless servant. The Empress was dismantling the entire world I thought I understood, piece by piece.

Ah, is that why it’s a secret meeting?

While having all sorts of thoughts and gaining deep enlightenment, the Empress—obviously the Empress just by looking—who had been elegantly sipping tea on the platform opened her mouth.

“Marchioness, release the Duchess’s neck. She might have been frightened.”

She was a marchioness? Huh? I was dumbfounded and couldn’t continue speaking. So the hierarchy in this room is different from other places too? Are these the bullies of the romance fantasy world?

Well, even if I went out of this room and shouted a hundred times that the marchioness hit me, if the Empress said no, it would all come to nothing. I couldn’t help but admire the Empress’s pettiness.

“The men of the Florence ducal house have quite consistent taste. They seem to enjoy wenches who combine beauty with vulgarity.”

“Though it pains me to report to Your Majesty the Empress, the previous Duke and my husband are people who live for love.”

Hmm, it hurt my conscience a bit since it differed from the truth, but let’s say that for now.

She smiled coldly as if she hadn’t expected me to talk back to her sarcasm and said:

“Men are originally prone to falling for vulgar wenches who fawn over them. But no matter how much they pretend to be noble, how can they hide that vulgar inner nature? Like you and Charlina. Just vulgar…… yes, no different from prostitutes. Isn’t that right?”

Wow, amazing. She managed to say “vulgar” three times in one go. Are those the only words she knows……

I expressed concern about the Empress’s language skills as she spoke so sweetly and gently.

Actually, I had planned to just keep my mouth shut and wait for a lifeline to come…… I rolled my eyes around for a moment. Well, the more dramatic the better, right?

I smiled gracefully and nodded.

“Yes, that’s right.”

“……What?”

“I harbored vulgar feelings and used my body to seduce Rubellian to become a duchess.”

“……This, this shameless……”

“If I’m being honest, I have no concept of shame. I don’t even know how to use the word shame.”

“……”

“Will you punish me?”

I stared at the Empress with eyes that said she was truly amazing. How did she know? That I originally lack refinement?

But did she think she could kill me? Not likely.

She would torment people but couldn’t kill them. Corpses are physical evidence, after all.

Whether my words were too outrageous, disbelief immediately spread across her face before she suddenly raised her hand.

As if she had been waiting for this, the marchioness’s fan roughly grazed past my cheek. To be precise, it tried to graze past.

But at the quite blatant gesture, I immediately dodged backward while grabbing the fan.

Snap.

“……!”

For a moment, I blinked at the sharply split air.

“Oh, oh my. I’m sorry. This wasn’t intentional. Sh-shall we go once more?”

“This brazen wench!”

At my words, the Empress seemed truly enraged as her face, which had been smiling nobly until just now, contorted grotesquely.

Along with that, she rose from the platform and came down, raising her hand.

Smack—!

A sharp pain flashed across my face for a moment. When I unconsciously raised my hand and lightly touched my face, I could see red blood on my fingers.

The Empress was looking at me with a cold face.

Still, she had pretended to be quite noble outside, but here it was okay to act like this?

“How about it, are you coming to your senses?”

“Ah, really. I have nothing to show except my face.”

If I acted weak here, I’d be cursed for acting weak, and if I fought back, I’d definitely be cursed for fighting back.

From what I knew, Charlina, the former duchess, was so fragile that a single slap from the Empress could break her—and because she seemed so pathetic, the Empress struck her even more.

In the end, I let out a deep sigh and raised my head.

“Your Majesty the Empress.”

“Yes, it seems the lady has gained some awareness—”

“I understand the anger toward someone who broke the one and only covenant of a lifetime.”

“……”

“Even a commoner like me knows that anger should be aimed at the one truly responsible.”

It’s clear to the Empress that the Emperor is at fault. Yet without the power or courage to face him, she lashes out at everyone nearby.

I understood, but only up to that point. My face blank, I finally spoke.

“If you’ve found someone to vent your anger on, you should have said so in advance, so I could prepare and come to suit Your Majesty the Empress’s mood.”

“Have you gone mad?”

“Yes. I sometimes have seizures and go around biting people randomly. Since I don’t know when I’ll have a seizure, please don’t touch me carelessly.”

At the mention of seizures, I could see the surrounding nobles hesitating. From their perspective, it must be fascinating. This odd woman with unknowable thoughts, suddenly stepping into their dainty world of polite “ha ha ho ho” laughter.

“Bi-bite?”

“Yes, Your Majesty. I bite.”

I’d never tried biting, but I was oddly sure I’d excel at it. I mean, just look at this blind, inevitable confidence.

I clicked my tongue in mild amusement—right before someone poured hot tea straight onto my head.

Ah, damn.

I whipped my head around. Some young lady I’d never seen before was glaring venomously. She threw the teacup in her hand to the floor and smirked.

“The crime of daring to covet His Highness the Crown Prince with your lowly body, and the crime of being irreverent to Her Majesty the Empress.”

I smiled, pushing back my hair dripping with tea.

The Crown Prince’s fiancée and one of the people who would roll Rachel around in the future. Melina Barnes, the young lady of the Barnes marquessate.

Ah, so she’s that one?

I glanced at her out of the corner of my eye. Her face was triumphant—so openly smug it was almost laughable.

Right, this should be enough. I’ve confirmed my target. Now that some time has passed, it should be about time for them to appear, right? With that, I clutched my cheeks in both hands and screamed at the top of my lungs.

“Kyaaaaaahhhhh!”

“……The tea wasn’t that hot, was it?”

“Huuuuuuk! Uuuuuk!”

“……?”

“Huuuuuuuk!”

A proper scream needs diaphragm control; after all, voice is half air, half sound. And when it’s time to scream, you do it with all your might. 

I’m already someone whose reputation is completely ruined, and I have backing too, so it doesn’t matter.

So now it was my turn to have a seizure.

At my scream that could rival King Kong, I could see people hesitating.

Right, when would they have seen someone like me in their lives? I must be a strange creature. The sight of me clutching my head and wailing as if the world had collapsed over just one cup of tea must have been quite bizarre, as even the Empress seemed to flinch slightly.

Actually, it would be best to squeeze out tears here, but since tears wouldn’t come, there was no other way.

I had no choice but to compete with sound.

“Kyaaahhh, my, my face……”

Kyah— good sounding, good expression. I roared like a beast whose face had been ruined, covering my face with my hands. At that, Melina hesitated and backed away.

I could suddenly feel her muttering.

“……Her, her face is f-fine though?”

She seemed truly stunned, unable to comprehend how I had gone from sharp retorts to this sudden outburst. Even the Empress was frozen, staring blankly at me. I paused only to breathe, my chest heaving as I recovered from the effort.

And started screaming again.

“Ahhhhhhhhh—!”

“Th-this crazy wench!”

“Your Majesty the Empress, you should step back for a moment……”

“How dare you try to fool me with such nonsense! Do you really think something like this would scare me?”

She already seemed scared though. I looked at the Empress, who was watching me with a flustered face, and let out a laugh.

Actually, this wasn’t the picture she had drawn. It would have been like Charlina, trembling and squeezing out tears on the floor.

But now she had the look of someone who had seen a gorilla that escaped from the zoo dancing in front of her.

Of course, I paid no attention to that at all. And most importantly—

“What is the meaning of this, Mother?”

Ah, finally here. Why so slow?

I panted and turned my head. Behind me stood the Crown Prince with a shocked face and Rubellian with a completely hardened face, and behind them was Lilith with a horrified expression.

“Ma-madam, your, your, your face……!”

Looking at the flustered noble ladies, I smiled meaningfully.

Currently, the Crown Prince doesn’t know the Empress’s true nature. In his eyes, the Empress was an elegant and caring mother to everyone.

So now, to finally lay it out—my plan was simple: expose the Empress’s true nature to the Crown Prince, and have him keep her in check from that point on.

As a bonus, it wouldn’t hurt to break the Empress before Rachel became her next target.

This is how you twist the original story. Of course, I don’t know the results.

“Crown Prince, how did you get here……”

The Empress had a flustered face. How shocked she must have been to show herself tormenting someone like this for the first time in front of her son, when she always showed the most loving face to anyone. For a moment, her gaze pierced me.

“You, surely you didn’t……”

Looking at her, I chuckled.

Indeed, showing directly would be better than telling the Crown Prince a hundred times. From now on, even if the Empress summons me, I can just make a pitiful face and say “I’m scared.” Wouldn’t touching her give them a reason to justify her actions?

Yes, you have to think several steps ahead.

Nodding with a satisfied heart, I suddenly flinched at Rubellian’s coldly frozen gaze.

Again, again with those eyes.

Though I had Lilith bring both Rubellian and the Crown Prince immediately if screams were heard from inside…… hmm, was I too hasty?

Rubellian approached with big strides. After taking off his coat and putting it on me as I sat on the floor, he slowly traced my cheek with his hand. Then, seeing the blood slightly on his hand, he gritted his teeth.

That was when it happened.

“Your Highness the Crown Prince, this is unjust! Th-that lady, that lady was irreverent first! Doesn’t Her Majesty the Empress naturally have the duty to correct such discipline!”

At Melina’s cry, the Crown Prince turned his gaze to me.

Ha, so this is how you’re going to play it? I was so dumbfounded I clicked my tongue, then gracefully collapsed toward Rubellian in front of me.

“Ah, Rubellian……”

“……!”

Like Snow White who ate a poisoned apple, Rubellian held me in his arms with surprised eyes as I collapsed.

“I was scared.”

“Eve?”

“I was scared, sob sob.”

However, since tears wouldn’t come, I deliberately snuggled into Rubellian’s embrace. With my face buried in his chest, I shrugged my shoulders and made sobbing sounds with my mouth while smiling meaningfully.

Truth comes in the dance of sweet and salty. Since I just showed them the salty part, now it’s time for the sweet part. I’ll make it so sweet your teeth fall out.

Contemplating this, the Crown Prince opened his mouth, stunned.

“Mother, how could such a thing happen…… Rubellian is my close friend, and Duchess Florence is his wife.”

First and foremost, you are human. As human to human, this conduct should never happen.

But contrary to my feelings, the Empress made excuses while flustered.

“Crown Prince, since she’s just entered nobility, I was simply educating her on manners. How can you act as if some great incident has occurred……!”

“Is this education? Pouring tea and injuring her face?”

Rubellian cut off her cry with a cold voice.

“Duke, education often demands a measure of corporal punishment.”

“Why should Your Majesty the Empress conduct that education?”

“……”

“She grew up preciously in a good family, and even I have never laid a hand on her carelessly, so by what right does Your Majesty?”

Ooh, this is exactly “Even my mom and dad never hit me, so what right do you have to hit me!” right?

I was amazed by Rubellian’s words. Held in his arms as he gently stroked my head, I glanced at the Empress, who gritted her teeth and said:

“Your words are harsh, Duke Florence. How dare you treat me, the Empress, so rudely just because of some mere wench? No matter how much His Majesty the Emperor favors you, Duke, I am the daughter of the Colica ducal house.”

“My wife is the mistress of the Florence ducal house. Regardless of His Majesty the Emperor’s favor, since when has the Florence ducal house been under the Colica ducal house?”

Ooh, my man speaks well. More, more!

In the end, the Empress quietly swallowed her anger. Since the Florence ducal house had come out like this, the Empress found herself with nothing to say.

Anyway, the Emperor secretly cherished Rubellian. The Crown Prince, who saw Rubellian as a brother, also followed him closely.

Of course, Rubellian didn’t seem to feel the same way.

“Mother. I overlooked you frequently inviting noble ladies and young ladies to the palace thinking you might be lonely, but now I need to reconsider a bit.”

“……Crown Prince!”

“I am His Majesty’s son, not the son of the Colica ducal house. Don’t try to manipulate me, and never do such things to the Florence ducal house again.”

“Crown Prince, you will be betrayed. What kind of family is the Florence ducal house……!”

“He is my close friend. He is like my brother, and when I ascend to the throne in the future, he will be my most reliable ally above anyone else.”

Why does my conscience ache at the Crown Prince’s words? Hmm, he trusted Rubellian this much, but Rubellian was actually antagonistic toward the Crown Prince. In the end, he sowed discord between the Colica ducal house and the Crown Prince, and killed the Emperor.

From Rubellian’s perspective, there were reasons, but……

That was the moment everything shifted.

“Your Highness the Crown Prince, this is unfair! Her Majesty the Empress was merely providing a gentle lesson!”

“Young Lady Melina Barnes.”

“The Florence duchess is just overreacting. Your Highness, how can you not trust Her Majesty’s character!”

If you were in her position, would you trust her?

I sighed. To end this persistent bad relationship with the Empress today, I need to step forward. I took a long breath, then slowly raised my head.

“Rubellian. Your Highness the Crown Prince.”

I made the most pitiful expression possible. First, Evangeline has a very delicate appearance, so this is easy. You lower your head down a bit sadly, then look up slightly with a wistful smile.

“Her Majesty the Empress, did nothing to me.”

At my words, the faces of the Empress’s faction changed strangely. Watching anxiety pass across their faces wondering what I was trying to do again, I forced out words with difficulty.

“Her Majesty the Empress just grabbed my neck and taught me because I didn’t bow my head as soon as I entered the room.”

“……!”

“And I shouldn’t raise my eyes, but since I’m lowly I didn’t know that well either…… sob.”

I couldn’t pull off crying, so I used my voice and charm instead, covering my mouth with my hand while sobbing. The Empress’s faction looked flabbergasted at my incredibly annoying behavior.

Watching this, Rubellian said coldly:

“Your Majesty, I hope you will not summon my wife carelessly in the future.”

Good, good. Isn’t this exactly what I was aiming for when I went completely mental and caused a ruckus today? This kind of justification is so common—I just don’t want to be the bad guy, so I paint the other person as the villain!

……Hmm, or not. The Empress was always bad anyway.

Rubellian stood up and helped me to my feet. Following him up, my gaze met Melina Barnes. And suddenly, I stumbled backward.

“Huk, honey. I’m scared.”

“Eve?”

“Young Lady Barnes…… scares me. My, my face……”

I shrank back and buried my face in Rubellian’s arm.

Ah, a similar thrill to when I crushed Gellin washed over me! I should use this often. I cause trouble, and leave the cleanup to Rubellian!

……Hmm, it seems a bit shameless, but if I can’t even do this, why would I have gotten married?

Melina, receiving Rubellian’s frightening gaze, stumbled backward. Meanwhile, I stuck close to Rubellian and leisurely left the Empress’s reception room.

Of course, I didn’t forget to scan the nobles once each and give them a rotten smile before leaving.

Lilith hurriedly came to wipe my face while muttering:

“Melina, that shrill thing. Next time I meet her at a party, I’ll properly leave nail marks on her face.”

“Ah, Lilith. This was the Empress’s doing.”

I replied to Lilith’s upset words. At that, Rubellian reached out and touched the wound on my cheek.

“First, I need to contact the temple.”

“It’s fine. It’ll disappear in a few days.”

But unlike my cheerful voice, Rubellian’s face looked quite complicated.

“Are you upset because I got hit?”

“I’m sorry.”

“For what? You didn’t hit me.”

“Still.”

“How sorry are you? Enough to not want to mistreat me anymore?”

“When did I ever mistreat you?”

At his words, I shot him a sideways glance. You’ve been mistreating me all along.

However, even at my expression, he seemed quite sorry and continued touching my cheek. Then he touched my hair, soaked with tea.

“Ah, it’s dirty because of the tea. Don’t touch it. This is black tea with milk, so it’s kind of sticky.”

“It’s fine.”

“You hate dirty things.”

“Didn’t you say so yourself?”

“Say what?”

“That originally, what’s yours isn’t dirty.”

Looking blankly at his face as he spoke calmly, I let out a long breath. What does this mean? So I’m his wife? It still feels strange, despite our brief marriage.

That was when the Crown Prince came out of the room, having finished his conversation with the Empress.

“I’m sorry, Duchess Florence. It seems like this kind of thing happened before too.”

“Actually, I expected she would call me someday.”

I just didn’t know she would do such crazy things. Of course, I responded with even crazier things.

“I’m sorry.”

Still, seeing a country’s crown prince apologize without reservation gave me quite some comfort.

Rachel, it seems you chose your man well after all. He’s a decent man. Except for rejecting my proposal with one blow.

I tend to hold grudges for a long time.

“It’s fine. I just hope there won’t be such incidents in the future.”

“I’ll make sure there are absolutely no such incidents from now on. Even if Mother calls you, you don’t have to come. His Majesty will understand this part too.”

“Thank you.”

It would be nice if you could eliminate the entire Colica ducal house while you’re at it, but Rubellian will probably handle that himself. Thinking calmly, the Crown Prince turned his head toward Rubellian.

“Rubellian, I’m sorry.”

Even receiving the Crown Prince’s apology, Rubellian had no particular reaction. He just looked at the Crown Prince calmly, then turned his head back to me.

“I don’t care what you do to me, but I hope my wife won’t have to frequent the imperial palace anymore.”

“I’ll do that. I guarantee it.”

Ooh, so decisive.

I looked at Rubellian with admiration. This wasn’t his usual self—he rarely revealed his emotions so clearly. What could be the matter?

Soon Rubellian fastened the front of my coat and led me away, when the Crown Prince called Rubellian again.

“Rubellian, I’m sorry.”

“……”

It didn’t seem to refer only to today’s incident. For some reason I felt a strange feeling and blinked, but Rubellian walked on while maintaining his silence.

* * *